Friday, December 17, 2010

The thing about fear

For women, I think fear is just as natural as hormones. Actually, the two have a lot in common. They both can control the stink out of us. And, they can ruin an entire day before we even realize what's come over us. Er, at least I think I'm not alone in this. Can I get an amen?

Fear of failure. Fear of rejection. Fear of not being good enough. Fear of loss. Fear of saying the wrong thing. Fear of looking the wrong way. Fear of having the wrong stuff. I've lost a lot of mind battles because of the sheer presence of fear.

This evening, I was curled up in my new bedroom on my bed. Just like always, I had my inspirational tunes filling the air and my softie wrapped tightly around me. And, I just sat before the Lord and asked Him to pour His truth into my life.

He centered my mind on fear. He took me to countless references in the Bible where we are commanded to have NO fear. That's right, fear is a sin. Did you catch that? When we allow fear to control our thoughts, we are actually doubting God's goodness in our lives.

So, what's a girl to do?

I can assure you that I have a constant battle with fear. The mental/emotional and spiritual battle of a cancer diagnosis is hard. Very hard. It's constant. But, God has shown me a fail-proof way of stopping fear in its tracks.

His Word.

Wasn't that easy? The very opposite of fear is faith. According to Hebrews 11:1 [NLT] "Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see."

I have so much that I want to tell you today about what the Lord is teaching me about faith in Him, ALONE. But, I don't want to get long-winded. I understand the appeal of short posts. So, I think that I'll just get to the bottom line.

The opposite of fear is faith. Faith is believing that God has a good plan for our lives, even when the situation seems impossible.

My charge to you today is for you to take a long look at your thought life. What do you spend your time thinking about? What is consuming your thoughts? Are these thoughts from the Lord and the hope that He gives, or are they Satan's lies? Choose faith, dear one. Hope in Him. Believe in Him. Trust in Him.

One thing that sent my mind in this direction was thinking back over the past year. I remembered that one year ago today, we received news of my second recurrence. Remember this day? Tonight, I'm praising God for the change He's brought about in my heart. Last year, my knees were knocking in FEAR! Now, the joy of the Lord is my strength. Only because of Him, not because of me.

Let's let His work continue in each of us. I'm trying my very best to allow Him to renew my mind daily. Will you join me?

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A few tidbits~

1. Today was my last day of work. It was bittersweet. I feel total relief to know that the Lord has provided the opportunity for me to retreat with Him for a while. But, I'll miss my work family terribly.

2. Down to 1 radiation treatment! Did you hear that? ONE!!! The last treatment is on Monday, and God has sustained me through these treatments each and every day. Pray that He will continue to do so!

3. For weeks I've had serious insomnia. I mean, serious! Like, I've been awake for 3-4 hours a night. Well, I realized yesterday (when my doctor told me) that my steroids are to blame. Unfortunately, I can't quit taking them quite yet, but I can lessen my dose. So, please pray for rest, rest, rest for me!

4. I'm having some minor headaches. This is totally normal when you have a craniotomy and follow it immediately with whole brain radiation. It's just a lot for the old noodle to handle. So, it takes me about 30 minutes in the mornings to get up and going. I wake up with a quite bad one. It's a weird headache, too. Like if I open my eyes or mouth to wide, it sends a sharp pain. Or, if I look too far in one direction, it causes pain. I know this sounds petty, but would you pray for this to end. It's annoying.

5. Pray for my sweet husband. You guys know that I love that guy with all that I have. I'm just in constant awe of his sweet care of me. He loves me like Christ loves the church, just like he's commanded to do. Anyway, pray for peace and rest for Brian. I often think that the spouse has a harder job than the patient. His new job is going well, but there is an overwhelming adjustment period in each one.

I love you guys more than you know! I appreciate you. I love your hearts for the Lord. And, I pray for you often. You are faithful friends of the heart!

11 comments:

Leslie said...

Girl, the Lord is SO working on this lesson in my life, because you are the third source to bring this truth in the past couple of weeks! What is my mind dwelling on? Is it true? Amazing how much repetition it takes for us to learn these lessons...thanks for sharing and reinforcing this truth that God is hammering home to me!

c said...

Lindsey,

I really needed to hear that today. I've had 5 urine tests in the past week and all of them have shown blood in my urine, but no infection. So now I'm supposed to see a urologist after the holidays. Of course, I googled it (mistake)and my mind immediately went to the wrong places. Even though there are a million minor reasons to have blood in your urine. My point is that I needed to be reminded that fear is a sin and shouldn't even be allowed in our lives. Thank you for sharing.

Courtney

Anonymous said...

Thank you, Lindsey. Miss seeing you...but love reading about Gods work in you and through you. With prayers and love, heather gentry

Paula said...

Lindsey & Brian,
As I was decorating for the teachers luncheon today, one of the ladies and I were singing "Standing on the Promises of God." As I was reading your post, I found myself singing the same song. That is exactly what you and Brian are doing.
You are so right about the fear thing. It can eat you alive if you let it and consume your thoughts. We are to keep our eyes upon Jesus and not of this world.
You have a great, strong man by your side and we are continuing to Storm His Throne on your behalf! The Chaffin's

Alabamamom said...

When I went through a period of fear the Word oF God was what helped me learn to stand firm. A verse that someone shared with me and I memorized during that time was this:
2 Corinthians 10:5 (New International Version, ©2010)
5 We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.


Every time the negative and fearful thoughts entered my mind I would pray that the Lord would forgive me and make my thoughts obedient to Him and His truth. His love for us is perfect and He promises that His love for us casts out fear.

katie said...

Oh Lindsey. I am awake this very minute, because fear has been controlling my mind for several hours today. I have had a LOT of struggles at my new job in the last month because of some constructive criticism I received. Today I found out about the upcoming deadlines and plan for the few months ahead and I have been struggling with it ever since.

I'm scared that I won't be good enough. That I won't be able to adequately meet the deadlines. Etc. But I'm stopping those thoughts right now because I have to trust that God has a plan for all of this. Thank you for reminding me of this tonight.

I'm choosing faith; not fear. And I'm keeping you in my prayers.

Elizabeth said...

praying for you

Shelly said...

So encouraging, Lindsey! Thanks!

Vickie J said...

Thank you so much for sharing your heart. I so needed to hear this today. satan opened a whole big box last night and laid it at my feet. Been having trouble giving it to Jesus. Thanks for the reminder.

Julie-CA said...

thank you for all the encouragement regarding fear, very uplifting and edifying and full of life changing truth once grasped. i am so glad you are on a leave now and that monday will be your last radiation treatment. what a great way to start off the new year putting former things behind you and looking onto this next season He has for you. love you dear friend and will pray for the things you asked.

Cari said...

You know when you're in church & you are in awe because you know the entire sermon was directed right at you? Well, that's how I feel about this post. You were talking straight to the heart of me.