Mom said that one of the first things that I said after finding out that I had a brain tumor was, "It's going to be fine. I can do it. But, I'm just so tired." Certainly, I don't remember saying this, because I barely remember a thing from those 48 hours surrounding the seizures. It's all a big 'ole blur.
I was thinking about instances in the Bible that could give me encouragement to stand strong, even when exhaustion sets in. You know by now that there is nothing special about Lindsey. I do NOT have any unique gifts or powers that allow me handle this situation. So, without the constant provision from God Most High, I am doomed to crater from the situation in which I've found myself.
Immediately, the Lord took me to Exodus 17. If you are familiar with Bible stories, I'm sure you know what happened in Exodus 17. But, I'll give you my quick version. Read it for yourself to get the exact wording.
Basically, Moses and the Israelites found themselves in a major war. Moses sent out Joshua and other men to fight against the Amalekites. However, God gave Moses a unique fighting tactic. He was to climb a mountain and raise His staff to the heavens. As long as he did this, the Israelites were victorious. But, soon Moses' arms grew tired, and he lowered his staff, causing the Amalekites to gain the upperhand. Soon, his arms became so tired that he physically couldn't hold them up, so Aaron and Hur found a stone for him to sit on and literally held up his arms for him. They held his arms steady until sunset. As a result, Moses and Israelites were victorious in the war!
After the war was over, God commanded Moses to make a permanent record of the victory. The Lord promised to erase the memory of the Amalekites for all generations. Moses built an altar and named it, "The Lord is my Banner!"
And, here's a little photo to give you a visual of the situation. A picture's worth a thousand words.
There were so many encouragements in this passage. First, I couldn't help but praise God for you guys, my wonderful blog readers. I've told you over and over again what an immense blessing you are to me, but you are more than that. You are my Aaron and Hur. You are holding me up when I just physcially can't do it on my own. You are wading through the muddy trenches with me. We are sharing this journey.
And, I also considered the staff. Why a staff? What's so special about a staff? But then, I happened to remember some past studies that I did on shepherds' staffs, and the things that they symbolize.
- They are a sign of work/livelihood. In this case, Moses was literally saying, "God, here are my livelihood, my skill set, my talents, my abilities. And yet, I'm going to lose this thing without your sustainment. Father, take ALL I have here, and bring about your victory."
- They are a tool of loving correction. When a sheep strays from the path, the shepherd uses the staff to gently return it to the flock. In this scenario, God called Moses to surrender his path to God's path. Moses could've been crying out, "Lord, I don't know where to go or how to lead these people. Please take this instrument of guidance and LEAD us with your gentle care."
- Staffs are a method of steadiness. When walking along rocky hills and rolling mountains, the shepherds used their staffs steady their balance. I can picture Moses saying, "God, we are hanging in the balance here. We MUST have your steadiness, or we're going to fall on our face!"
It's so nice to know that "all scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness." (2 Timothy 3:16). It applies today, so let's hide it in our hearts.
And, I want to challenge you today. I KNOW that many of you out there are going through your own challenges and trials. I KNOW that God is doing miraculous and mighty things in your hearts and changing your lives. I KNOW that some of you are hurting, and you need our prayers. I desperately want this blog to be the Lord's, not Lindsey's. I'm so unimportant in all of this. And, I want it to be a forum of discipleship and intercession. So, here are some rules for today. And, you know I'm a teacher at heart, and it makes us happy when people follow rules. :)
- Leave a comment. I happen to have access to statistical data on this blog, and I'm aware of about 600-800 of you who never de-lurk from the shadows. We want to know who is in our circle of intercession and fellowship. We want to bear each other's burdens and PRAY for each other. Please, if you are reading this post, just leave a quick comment. It can even be anonymous. Just say, "HI!". Please and thank you. :)
- If you have a prayer need in your life, let us know about it. I hate that I'm always the one laying out my prayer requests, and I hardly ever have the opportunity to intercede for you. Again, leave it anonymously. But, this is a place of sincere intercession.
- Know that I truly care about each and every one, and that is my only reason for asking you to stop stalking, and let us form a spiritual army for the Lord, just like Moses and Aaron and Hur.
And, last but not least (sorry for the super long post!), here are my prayer concerns for today~
- Pray for Brian, that God would give him rest, refreshing, and endurance to withstand under extreme stress. I can't even imagine being in that man's shoes - new job, wife with cancer who can't drive, sold a house and moved, new car, lost a dog, loss of an income, increased medical expense. All in 2 week's time. But, you know he's handling it with the same captivating, quiet strength that he handles every challenge.
- My doctors have decided to send me to MD ANDERSON in Houston, TX for further consultation. This requires travel and overnight stays and mucho dinero! Certainly, we trust the Lord 100% for His perfect provision. He's proven it numerous times, and we're confident He'll do it again.
- Treatment - You know, at some point you start feeling like a science experiment. Pray God's hand on my doctors and all who make treatment decisions for me. I keep telling them that I'm so glad that my hope is in the God's healing power (and not them). You can imagine how happy that makes them! :) But, it's the truth. It's hard to sign up for a debilitating treatment when you're very healthy (other than the cancer, of course :)
- Pray God's protection over my mind. Just like before, I feel that this battle is far more spiritual than it is medical. I need God's safeguarding on my mind. Satan has a way of sneaking in when I least expect it. Pray that I will take every thought captive.
- And, pray for Josh and Lauren. I'm still in awe of the sacrifce that they've made for us. Pray that God's storehouses of blessing would be opened on them for their extreme generosity.
Well, folks, I think that's all today. Let's try to remember the miraculous power of God Almighty as we go about our days. Let's try to allow Him to spill into every compartment of our lives, knowing that He is fully in control of it all.