For weeks, I've been saying to Brian, "I just want a cupcake. Or a donut. Or a doughy chocolate chip cookie." I have always loved to bake. I think that this is a trait that I inherited from my paternal grandmother. When I was little, I would often spend the afternoons with her, and we would bake a yummy dessert every single day. She'd pull out her stand mixer, and we'd work away to create some sort of sugary masterpiece. Baking represented more than just the delicious product. It was a symbol of security and love. You know how it is here in the South - food is love :)
As I grew into an adult, one of the first expensive things that I owned was a red KitchenAid stand mixer. To me, this mixer held the same feelings that began way back in the day in my Grandma's kitchen. It was a sign of love, warmth, and happiness. All is well in the world, as long as there's a pie in the oven.
Well, now I'm an adult, and I haven't used that mixer since jumping headfirst into this new regimen. Somehow, it doesn't seem as useful as it once did. I'm sure that one day I'll learn how to easily whip up cakes and cookies that are gluten-free and sugar-free, but for now it's a bit daunting.
This evening, I was thinking about this very thing as I stood over the kitchen sink cleaning up a meal that was better fit for the dogs than for us. It was a meal that we probably would've enjoyed 6 months ago, but now our tastes have changed. We no longer like the things that used to satisfy us.
If I've learned anything through this whole food process, I've learned that it's so much bigger than food. For me, this has been a purification process. I used to feel guilty for eating things because I knew that they would add unwanted pounds to my body. But now, I no longer even like them. They kind of sicken me.
Isn't this what God is calling us to do? Is He not calling us to become more and more like Him and less and less like the world? Doesn't He allow us to crave Him and His purity so much that the things of the world are detestable to us?
I don't even know if I'm explaining myself well. This has just really been on my mind these last few days. Tonight, I am sitting at my computer (sweating bullets because of these crazy hot flashes!) with tears in my eyes. Y'all, I can see God's purpose coming full circle. Sure, one bout of cancer seemed hard, but it didn't get me to the place where God wanted me to be. If I'd only had one bout of cancer, I'd still be treating my body the same way that I've always treated it.
I'm praising God for round 2 tonight, because He's allowed me to truly understand what it means to make my body God's temple. 1 Corinthians 6:19 says, "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own."
I am reminded tonight that I am not my own. I belong to the Lord. I encourage you to join me in treating your body as God's temple. For you, this might not mean going to the same lengths as me. For you, it might mean that you are going to give up soft drinks, start taking evening walks, or begin eating a fresh vegetable at every meal. Pray and ask God how He desires for you to care for your body. We are not our own.