Then, the struggle moves from a personal, lonely battle to a public spectacle. The outpouring of cards, notes, calls, emails, and gifts is overwhelming and humbling. The prayer commitments are huge, and people love on you almost to the point of suffocation. I mean this in the nicest way. We needed that. I needed to know that many many many people "had my back", so to speak. I needed to know that I had an army of support. I needed, and the Lord provided. This is always the case.
Then, the newness wears off. The shock becomes common and the sting seems to dull. This is when the real battle begins for the endurers. And, this is our current phase. We have entered the stage in which this is simply our life. It's not what we would've chosen, but it's what we have. And, I am confident that it is God's very best for us. This is the point that really matters. Of course I could handle the initial stuff with grace. Who couldn't with so much support? But, this is where the rubber meets the road. This is where we find what I'm made of. It's the long-suffering that counts.
So, can I petition you to pray specifically once again?
- Pray that I will suffer well for the cause of Christ. Pray that even in the quiet moments of solitude that I will exemplify Christ. Pray that when the hovering of support dies down, that I would praise Him even more. It's all about the Lord.
- This sounds petty, but pray for my sleep. Y'all, my hormones are a roller coaster, and I can't seem to maintain a constant temperature to save my life! During the day, I am continually dealing with hot flashes, and at night I am waking up almost every hour with night sweats. Perhaps this is over sharing, but I'm exhausted!
- Pray for safe travel and a wonderfully informative and helpful doctor's appointment on Tuesday. I am headed back to the doctor who is working with me on nutrition and immunity building. Pray for his wisdom, understanding, and God's perfection in his guidance of me.
Please know that we are doing great. In fact, I was greatly encouraged today as I stood in line at the health food store. I had a heap of organic, whole foods. The lady behind me said, "Wow! I should eat like you. Do you always eat like that?" I just briefly told her my plan and the reasons behind it. She said, "I would NEVER have guessed that YOU have cancer. Not in a million years." To me, these kind words encouraged me to press on with all of this. It is a lot of work, a ton of money, and a commitment of time. But, if it's working, I'm game! I feel as though the Lord has enlightened me, and shown me a way of His health. And, I'm committed to it. Well, we're committed to it. Brian is gladly eating all of the crazy concoctions that I put in front of him. What a sport!