Friday, September 4, 2009

"You have the handwriting of a serial killer!"

Do you remember the line from the best movie of all time - Steel Magnolias? Isn't it interesting how much penmanship can reveal about a person?

On Wednesday, I had a routine checkup and treatment at the cancer center. I went alone. I always do. It doesn't bother me anymore. But, as I sat there, I just glanced at my medical folder that was on the table beside my chemo chair. I thought, "Hmmm. I think that I'll just glance through this thing."

So, I did. I picked it up and began thumbing through page after page of test results, doctors' orders, appointment notes, etc. After 30 or so minutes of perusing the material, I came to the last page in the chart. There, before my eyes, I saw the very first forms that were required from me last September.

Of course, there was nothing shocking or new on these, but they did strike a chord in me. And, not because of what they said, but because of how they looked. You see, all of the questions were answered with familiar penmanship that was nothing like my own. It was that of my husband.

Instantly, my eyes stung with tears. I remember that day. I remember it well. We pulled into the building's parking garage with matching knots in our stomaches. "I don't think that I can do this," I confided in Brian. "I think I'm going to vomit."

Brian took me by the hand and led me across the parking lot and into the building. As soon as we walked in, two ladies walked by us, one wearing a scarf and the other steadying herself with a walker.

We rounded the corner to find a bronze statue of a bald woman. It alarmed me. "Really?" I thought. "I really have to do this?"

We walked hand in hand to the reception desk and checked in. The kind lady handed me a clipboard with a stack of forms and asked that I have a seat and fill each one in. As I quickly took a seat, I began to write. Tears built up in the corners of my eyes. I looked at Brian, and I know my face must have communicated more than I could've ever said with words, because he quickly took the clipboard and said, "I'll do it. You just tell me what to write."

For the next 20 minutes or so, he asked me the dumbest questions like, "What's our address? What's your phone number? Where do you work? And, how do you spell that?"

Of course, I couldn't help but laugh and then tell him to shove off. But, what a way he has with me. I sorta knew it then, but I really know it now. He often sees my stress before I do.

Wow! The Lord has brought us so far since that day.

Today is my 1st Cancerversary. One year ago today, I added cancer to my area of ministry. What a blessing it has been. (You can read the story here.)


Sweet Simplicity said...

God blessed you with a great man!

One of Nettie's Girls said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
one of nettie's girls said...

I should have known when I saw the sweet picture of the two of you that I should wait and read this one at home. I didn't so here I sit at work bawling. Your stories are incredibly moving. Please write a book.

Jolene said...

I stumbled upon your blog over a year ago and have been reading if off and on since then. I've never commented because I don't have a blog of my own and I don't want to be the wierd anonymous commenter. But I have to say congratulations on one year! I am a 27 year old female who celebrated my 11 year anniversary last month. I was the tender age of 16 when I was diagnosed and given 2 weeks to live. Like you, I had a strong relationship with God. Because of that it was like his love and peace covered me during that time, and I never once feared death or whatever cancer was going to hold for me. I know this is going to sound wierd, but I am so thankful that I was able to go through this at a young age. I learned life lessons that some people twice my age are still trying to grasp. I was asked to speak at my ladies group at church a couple of years ago, and the leader asked me if I wanted to wait until January so I could speak on new beginnings. I told her I would rather speak that month, which was November, because I felt my story was more about thankfulness. I'm so glad that God has brought you thru this time in your life and you have came out on the other side triumphant!

Jill said...

LIndsey, I don't really know what to write, other than to say that you are an inspiration. Your faith is evident, and God has truly blessed you and your wonderful husband.

Leslie said...

Crying at my desk at work over the sweetness of marriage as seen in you and Brian over the past year. I know you have a new area of ministry in cancer, but it sounds like he could do some amazing work with husbands whose wives have cancer!

Kelli Davis said...

Wow. How the Lord blesses us. And how He takes simple, loving actions, and teaches us such incredible lessons. I'm so glad that you have such a wonderful partner in your life- the Lord is good!

Michele said...

You have a wonderful husband...and he knows just the right moments to make you laugh. You have come so far and you are so strong.

Have a great weekend!

Katie said...

This post brought tears to my eyes. My Dad is undergoing chemotherapy right now and your blog is so encouraging for me to read. Thank you so much for your writing.

Shelly said...

Loved this blog!

Unknown said...

I read your blog often but don't comment. I have been following your posts from the beginning and want to say what an amazing woman you are! You inspire, give hope and make me want to aspire to more because of the stories you share and the positive attitude you have about life and God. You are wise beyond your years and it is a pleasure reading your blog. God bless you and your husband.